If anything -

Its ironic how the strangest of situations can put you off in an instant.

Irtaash

Aother up-coming Pakistani rock band I gather. Kaali Ratein is a fresh single with some good guitaring. The overall tempo is catchy and so are the lyrics. The video could have been better had Zeeshan used a slightly different background.

On a side note, why do all the lead vocalists of hard rock bands in Pakistan sound the same? They try so hard to imitate Eddie Vedder for his deep vocal style. There is a fine line between inspiration and imitation. However, if this is done to be accepted by the mainstream commercial media, they ought to know the importance of originality. That is, of course, if they want to stick around for a long period of time.

The End..

I'm approaching the last days in school and I for one have always wanted my way out of here.. Why then, doesn't the thought crack a smile on my face?

Jeff Beck

Jeff Beck playing Niting Sawney's track Naadiya.

Though I'm extremely proud of myself for being able to add audio file to my blog finally, but I can not help but fret about the two freaking hours it took me to figure this thing out. Whats even more heart wrenching is the fact that I could have done this in less than 3 mins but instead I read every damn faq regarding audio and html codes. Downloaded softwares to upload music files and then to create a link. And all this time the solution was right there in front of me!! Whats that phrase in punjabi.. jithon di bail othe aan khloti? okay whatever that maybe. This my current fav track. Enjoy for now.

*Grin*

Allah mian is just so wonderful!! Abeer's timings were perfect! And yes, she managed to cheer me up.. Beere, if you're reading this.. . love you so much babes! =)

Back to maths now.. wish me luck!

Final Hour

In less than 3 hours, I'll be giving my maths exam. Preparation is better than what it was 5 hours back. But its neither complete nor satisfactory. Bull has completely ruined my digestive system. The terrible taste still lingers in my mind and mouth. The very thought.. yuck. Anyway, I'm extremely stressed right now. It might sound strange but I'm kind of thinking of reasons to be contentful with life. I need reasons to smile right now *teary*. OOMMMGG! Abeer is online! brb!!

Witch Queen!!

Yes I'm as high as ever. The bull has done its job. I think that 'puke condition' was triggered by maths book and notes. I feel like burning down each and every paper with the remotest connection with maths.

Witch Queen is a zaberdast song!!

i've lost it

I'm having another doze of redbull even though the damage its gonna cause is worse than anyone can ever imagine.

singing.. cuz its a bitter sweet symphony, this Liifffeeee!!!!

No change, I can't change
I can't change, I can't change
But I'm here in my mind
I am here in my mind
And I'm a million different people
from one day to the next
I can't change my mind
no, no, no, no, no, no, no
I can't change
I CAN'T CHANGE ITT!!

Lesson Learned

Redbull is nothing but 'bull'. After finishing one can this morning, I could stay awake for merely an hour. My hopes of staying up all morning to study were crushed. I tried to sleep but was completely restless. Had a severe headache when I finally got up. It has been 7 hours since then and the headache is still there. To top it all, I can't eat now cuz then I feel as if I'm gonna puke.. *sniff*

oh and I got the complete album of Crystal Method :D

Out of my mind

I slept for barely 2 hours before my English exam yesterday. Came home at 4:30 in the afternoon. Slept again at around 6. Got up at 8:15 and have been awake since. Thats a total of 4.15 hours sleep in the last, well three days I suppose. I'm in the middle of nowehere with maths. Practically wasted all night trying to find tracks by The Crystal Method and some other 80's punk rock stuff. No I did not succeed. I think I was living in denial for the past one week.. months maybe. That somehow, I wouldn't have to give my maths exam. Lightening struck me last night though. Yes, I panicked. My heart ached and like any other student, I cursed life for its miseries. Tried to calm my nerves by telling myself that I have been through worse even though i couldn't pin point the worse conditions.

Few hours later, my nerves gave up on me. Applied some gel on my shoulders for the chronic pain caused by continuous restlessness. I saw no hope. Wished someone, somehow, coud get me few cans of Redbull. Baba surprised me by dropping off 2 cans. He's being really caring and supportive these days. Adds all the more pressure for me to do good in exams. Nonetheless, here I am with a can of Redbull in my hands. The only issue left now is the drinking part of the damn thing. I have always hated this drink but desparate times call for desparate measures. Hence, I am taking one sip at a time with much disgust. I can only but pray that it does the trick. However, the irony is that despite my situation right now I think I'm enjoying myself.

Shooting The Messenger

Shooting The Messenger

just a reminder.. would like to read more in the morning.. or rather afternoon. Right now i'm just too tired; been living on 4 hours sleep for the past 32 hours.

Masnavi

These are some excerpts from Masnavi, by Rumi. I'm awestruck because of the way these words hit me. I just HAVE to get these books!

Sell your cleverness and buy bewilderment. Cleverness is mere opinion; bewilderment intuition.

I regard not the outside and the words, I regard the inside and the state of the heart. I look at the heart if it be humble, Though the words may be the reverse of humble. Because the heart is substance and the words accidents.

Would you become a pilgrim on the road of love? The first condition is that you make yourself humble as dust and ashes.


Why should I fear?
When was I less by dying?
Yet once more I shall die as man,
To soar with angels blest;
But even from angelhood I must pass on..

Shoot the Moon

Did I ever mention how much I love Everwood? I thought given that I haven't watched the show for decades and have lost touch with it, I wouldn't like it anymore. But I was wrong. I watched mere 15 mins of Shoot the Moon today, and it reminded me of why the show had me hooked in the first place. Its so real and I know this sounds weird, but somewhere down the line I 'get' whatever some characters go through.
Below is one reason.. =)



Tell us about yourself in such a way that we will have a good sense of who you are; 500 words.

I wish you would've asked me that two years ago. I could've told you exactly who I was, who I'd be. Two years ago I knew it all and the thing is, I was right. Plans are like candy to the Fates. The only thing you could ever be sure of is nothing ever goes the way you imagined. I should probably be used to that by now. The thing is you can never tell when everything you counted on might fall apart – no matter how solid the rock. Rocks break. Everything changes, even when you think you’re sure, especially. To be fair, if I was one of the Fates looking down at the best laid plans of dumb little people, I'd probably see mine and want to mess with them too.

You want to know about me in 500 words? I get scared sometimes and disappointed. I have doubts and I love getting my way. I don’t like change, but I know it's good for me and inevitable so I welcome it as best I can. There’s a poem by Johann Franck that says it better than I will. "Defy the old dragon, defy fear. The world may rage and quake but I shall remain singing in perfect peace." Yeah, things happen – things you don’t expect – or want or like. The world rages and you become someone you didn’t know you’d ever be. And there you are, in your clothes, in your life, this is my future, this is me. This is me and I want things I never thought I would. I want the possibilities a school like Princeton can afford. A place to grow, meet new people. A place to be surprised when life turns out to be nothing like I imagined. You have to be grateful for it – in perfect peace.